Sunday, April 22, 2012

"different names for the same thing"

About a year ago, the thought of changing my last name was daunting to say the least. Why should I wake up one day with a different last name? Won't I always be a Driskell? Well, yes to answer that as briefly as possible. But also, no...

Slowly, I came to realize the importance, and lack there of, when it comes to a name. Thomas and I agreed that we would like to share the same last name and that name would be his. However, my perception of myself was, and still is, closely tied to my family name to the point that I once felt the need to defend it and keep it as my own. Talk about attachment issues, yes those I do have.

I will also admit to the fact that I felt some feminist voice scratching at the back of my throat trying to get the point across that I didn't have to take my husband's last name. I didn't have to follow tradition. blah, blah, blah. So, how to escape the conflict on one's own mind...?

Truthfully, I'm not so sure that I did. Doesn't that take a lifetime (or lifetimes)? I think I heard someone say that once or twice; regardless, I am slowly letting go of the name attachment one letter and account name change at a time. After all, throughout the world there are different names for the same thing. It's always the concept that sticks, names vary culture to culture and generation to generation.

Something for me to remember as I continue to adapt to seeing Hauser instead of Driskell...

"The simplest questions are the most profound. Where were you born? Where is your home? Where are you going? What are you doing? Think about these once in a while, and watch your answers change." ~Richard Bach

Maybe I would add "what is your name?" to that list.