ode to india

I've been pretty quiet on the blog front in recent months. Let's see, perhaps it's because I got married in April, moved into a bare apartment that same month, spent my entire break from school in Kansas celebrating with family/friends (having a blast!) and then dove right back into studying upon my return to sunny California. Then, it was three months of studying followed by our August adventure, which left me exhausted and back to studying. Oh, and by the way, I contemplated, deeply I might add, writing something in regards to the aforementioned "August adventure;" however, if that ever happens you'll have to pay me for it. No, really. That material deserves a book of it's own. I know Uli and Luke will back me up on that.

So, why am I writing today? More or less, just for the hell of it. I'm hoping to keep this blog hanging on for now and then revamp it when Thomas and I again have time to travel. I'm sure you'll see a few posts about our travels here on the West coast in the next few years.

Despite the fact that I can't seem to keep one blog going, I'm planning on getting another one started soon for health, wellness, yoga and acupuncture related topics. So, in case you don't have enough "health tips" popping up on your news feed, then you'll be able to check out mine. On a more serious note, I am learning a lot of really cool alternative health tips (user friendly I might add). The blog will be part of a future website for my business related endeavors.

Oh yes, I did have something more exciting to share with you today. Almost a year ago, I flew to India for the first time and as you might recall, I found it to be a fascinating place. Here is where I go on to explain how it changed my life and I plan on returning there and opening a yoga center/orphanage. No, I won't be doing either of those things; however, India did change me, in the same way that any other day of your life can change you. Often, days, people, places or thoughts change the way we see the world around us and for a fleeting moment we realize it and we realize that we can never see the world as we once did. It's always for the better, that is, if we can find the place of acceptance within ourselves.

I will return to India. It is known to travelers when they will return to trace some of their past footsteps. Until then, I look back on my experience in India with nothing but joy.

Have a look yourself:

This is just a short video along the ganges river. It was close to the end of my time in Rishikesh and it was I think the only time I took one of the jeep taxis.

 

Brandyoga

Looking to brand a new style of yoga...look no further...

1. Mind Buddhi Yoga (manifest your buddhi)

2. Shaktify Yoga

3. Inner.g.yoga

4. Yogalution

5. [anything] Flow (because adding the word "flow" always makes sense and basically means yoga)

"different names for the same thing"

About a year ago, the thought of changing my last name was daunting to say the least. Why should I wake up one day with a different last name? Won't I always be a Driskell? Well, yes to answer that as briefly as possible. But also, no...

Slowly, I came to realize the importance, and lack there of, when it comes to a name. Thomas and I agreed that we would like to share the same last name and that name would be his. However, my perception of myself was, and still is, closely tied to my family name to the point that I once felt the need to defend it and keep it as my own. Talk about attachment issues, yes those I do have.

I will also admit to the fact that I felt some feminist voice scratching at the back of my throat trying to get the point across that I didn't have to take my husband's last name. I didn't have to follow tradition. blah, blah, blah. So, how to escape the conflict on one's own mind...?

Truthfully, I'm not so sure that I did. Doesn't that take a lifetime (or lifetimes)? I think I heard someone say that once or twice; regardless, I am slowly letting go of the name attachment one letter and account name change at a time. After all, throughout the world there are different names for the same thing. It's always the concept that sticks, names vary culture to culture and generation to generation.

Something for me to remember as I continue to adapt to seeing Hauser instead of Driskell...

"The simplest questions are the most profound. Where were you born? Where is your home? Where are you going? What are you doing? Think about these once in a while, and watch your answers change." ~Richard Bach

Maybe I would add "what is your name?" to that list.

Wedding Details

Thomas and I are getting married in just under 4 weeks! So, I just wanted to let everyone know what we decided on. We'll be getting married on April 13th, and yes we do realize that it's Friday the 13th. Since we met on a "Friday the 13th," it seemed like a nice date. Also, we thought the date would help us to not forget our anniversary in the future.

We'll be getting married in San Diego at Sunset Cliffs around sunset, 6:30pm to be exact. Neither of us have been here, but it looks something like this....

thanks google images

I originally tried to find something closer to Los Angeles, but quickly realized that the elopement business is more happening in San Diego. I think it has something to do with the nearby military bases. Setting it all up was really easy and the officiant seems laid back and gets great reviews.

It will be just the two of us, plus the photographer and officiant. The photographer is also doing a video for us, which is great for those of you who are dying to see us get married. We have him for four hours, so that will take most of our afternoon. We're meeting him at Balboa Park, which probably means nothing to you, but I'm really excited about it due to the fact that there are gardens designed like the Alcazar Castle gardens in Sevilla, Spain. I used to visit the castle on a regular basis while living in Sevilla to study.

google images again...

We'll stay near Sunset Cliffs until Sunday before making our way back to La Habra, and then slowly back to Kansas City the next week. The reception is on Friday the 27th at Cellar 222 in the Crossroads Art District of Kansas City, MO and we are so excited to celebrate with everyone! And yes, I will be wearing my dress to the reception...dinner, drinks, dancing!

Uncertainty is certain

In general, people want to be in the know. As in, we want to know what's coming next, so we can have some sort of "plan" or at least a glimmer of expectation. Why, if uncertainty is certain for all, do we suffer from some sort of perpetual attachment to the idea of a "certain" future? 

Certainly uncertain about something

This is, of course, something that I have struggled with personally and it most often comes to the surface at the suggestion of someone else. In other words, I do a pretty good job of "suppressing" (for lack of a better word) my attachment issues until someone else inquires nicely about my future in hopes of "being in the know." 

Example: most recently, I have been asked by numerous people; friends, family and acquaintances alike, where Thomas and I will be living in the future. It is a legitimate question and seeing how intriguing Thomas and I are, I understand why people are so curious. Haha, come on, I'm not that pretentious people. But really, what future are we talking about here? Next month? We will still be living right here in Southern California. Next year? Most likely the same. Five years? No. Idea. Why would we limit ourselves by saying otherwise? But let's not get carried away...

I am a work in progress and with that said, it does take me a good dose of self-reflection to eliminate the chances of some smart ass remark coming out of my mouth when asked such questions. Yoga helps with that, allowing me to find that place where I can separate myself from emotional reactions. So, for every time I'm approached with these questions, I get to practice again and again. Then I realize, again and again how much I have to learn when it comes to attachment and the concept of "never give up, always let go."

In essence, these occasions of kindhearted people showing interest in my life are just there to teach me something about what's going on inside myself. Often it works that way, if your eyes are open to it; and I'm not talking about the eyes in your head.

The joy and adventure of life are found abundantly in the vast land of uncertainty. That's what I believe, right? If so, would I be bothered by someone asking about my not-so-certain future? Somewhere, I am still overcoming my attachment to "being in the know," to planning the next adventure, the next educational pursuit, on and on it goes.

I don't think I'm alone in this endeavor...so really why are we attached to the idea of a certain future? Tell me what you think. Leave a comment, email me...tweet, facebook, you know what to do. I'm hoping to turn this into something. I just don't know what that something is yet.

Life out west

So, I haven't been the best about keeping in touch with everyone, which is not really like me but everyone gets that way from time to time. A lot has changed in my life in the past few months and the fun is just beginning.

Let's see, since the beginning of the year I moved to California, started a new graduate school program, started a new teaching job, searched for/recently found an apartment, planned a wedding and of course spent a fair share of time studying. Yes, I've been busy, but thanks to my wonderful intern who provides stellar weekly acupuncture treatments and my daily yoga practice, I am rolling with it all.

On to what I really want to share...funny happenings in California. For the most part, living in Orange County is very similar to Johnson County. In general, things look polished and suburbia is flourishing with restaurants, targets, starbucks and strip malls. Well, there are probably more starbucks here when compared to JoCo, but I suppose that is just in proportion to the number of people living here.

It's not all same, same though. It's far more culturally diverse than living in Kansas. This past Friday I went to visit a mosque in a Middle Eastern community with a Muslim friend of mine, followed by a deliciously authentic falafel lunch. One of the people I live with is from El Salvador, various Asian restaurants are just around the corner and a few of my saved radio stations are Spanish.

Then, there are the few things I've noticed in California that make me laugh, and it's definitely not the traffic. Well, that's not entirely true, one thing is how people react to rain, which is related to traffic. In short, it's a very big deal here. Just last week, one of my professors waited ten minutes before starting class because it was sprinkling out. The biggest concern of course is how rain affects traffic, or in other words, people's lack of the ability to drive while it's raining.

Ok, so there is one more traffic related topic...speed limit and lane changing rules. It seems to me that neither of these are enforced. I've seen people driving their BMWs like complete jackasses cruising five lanes over, no signal needed. Seriously? The term "texas lane change" had to come from LA.

There are other minor differences of course, but it's still the land of the free or at least that's the idea. Oh, and there happens to be this really large body of water about 30 minutes away, I think they call it the Pacific Ocean. Unfortunately, the majority don't seem to notice it or the way it's being so poorly treated.

Luna de miel...

With only two months left on our long distance journey, I'm finding it more challenging to live in the present moment. I bring myself back again and again, but before I do that...

Thomas and I have known each other for less than a month. We are sitting on a dock on a small island in Panama, listening to really bad reggae music blasting from an early 90's sound system. To top it off, we are drinking rum and coke out of plastic cups, which is as classy as it gets on Isla Bastimentos. I don't remember exactly, but most likely there are children playing in the background. On this island there are always children running around with no parents in sight. Although this wouldn't normally be considered 'romantic,' we are in complete la-la (or as Thomas and I would say "lulu") land; you know, that phase of the relationship when everything is no less than perfect.  

Hesitantly, I say the following: "I think I'm falling in love with you." The few seconds it takes to get a response seem like hours. Then comes a slight laugh, a moment of self-doubt, followed by: "I already did." I don't think either of us said much of anything for a good while after that.

Our nine day Panama trip was a big milestone despite the short time we had known each other. You learn a lot about each other spending 24 hours a day together for nine days in a row, as I'm sure you can imagine. Even if I try, I cannot remember a single thing about that trip that I found annoying or cumbersome in any way. The five hours we spent standing on a bus going across a small mountain range on winding roads was spent talking about everything you could imagine. When we wanted to do something, we did it and when we wanted to just do nothing, we did that too. We hiked the tallest peak in Panama one day and spent the whole day laying around the next. No games, no guessing what the other person wanted to do or wondering how to act, just choosing free will moment to moment.

In retrospect that was one of the greatest lessons of all in yoga and life. Two people can be in relationship with each other free of conflict and complaint. We hear that conflict is good and it's ok to fight, and of course when ego comes into play (and it always does at some point) conflicts are there to be had and there is no reason to judge that as bad. However, I believe it is possible to have a relationship free of conflict and complaint. I've been there on occasion. That's not to say that Thomas and I are living some eternal bliss. We have also had so-called hard times in our relationship, when ego creeps in to play a bigger and bigger role. However, the knowledge and understanding of our potential plays a crucial role in our ability to keep moving and evolving individually and together.

Whether you have been married for years or never want to have any kind of long term commitment, we could all benefit from taking a moment to consider this potential to have conflict free relationships. It's something we speak of often in yoga philosophy and I would say it's a key teaching of many of the world's religions. Peace. Happiness. Free will. Harmony. All different ways to describe the same concept that penetrates the essence of the human experience.  

Wayward

I will admit that I came to Los Angeles with some excitement regarding the abundance of yoga in "Rishikesh of the West," but the yoga scene here can be quite overwhelming. So many styles, so many teachers, so many studios, what's a yoga teacher/student to do?

Besides taking it an asana and a studio visit at a time, I have spent an unmentionable amount of time researching studios, styles, teachers, etc. Based on the information I have gathered I would like to propose a list of five necessary accomplishments for becoming a "famous" yoga instructor. That's obviously why I moved here, haha.

1. Have professional photography of you performing asana on a mountain or a beach or anywhere stunningly beautiful. We're not just talking any old forward fold either, it has to be either an arm balance or anything that makes you look freakishly flexible. You get extra points for less clothing, wearing mala beads and practicing whatever mudra makes you look the best.

2. Maximize your social media potential. You need at least all of the following: your own website, twitter account and facebook (personal and business). An optional, and  beneficial, extra is a youtube channel with instructional asana videos. Even just taking a few minutes to explain and demonstrate how to get into pincha mayurasana will suffice. Remember, less is not more in this case, and don't worry, the slight inflation of the ego is just a small sacrifice for reaching out to more students.

3. Be innovative and patent. Be innovative and patent. Be innovative and patent. I am sure you are the only person in the history of yoga who has practiced such and such. The more creative you get in this process the better; I would offer examples but of course I'm saving those for myself. 

4. Be part of a teacher training program or better yet, lead it yourself. This gives you more credibility and feeds your soul (and your bank account). Bonus dollars are awarded for leading this teacher training somewhere exotic, like Bali or the moon if that is a feasible option for you.

5. Get endorsed. It's preferable that this endorsement come from an eco friendly yoga clothing line or any other yoga related companies that sell props, mats, etc. Students want to know that you are 'living' yoga, which is reflected in your clothing, obviously. Well, clothing and what you eat, so a vegan gluten free raw diet is best. It's just good PR.

*Disclaimer: None of these will insure that you are actually a good teacher. ~namaste~

The Story of the Rings

Thomas left the states less than a week ago, which was only a week or so after we made the journey from Kansas to Los Angeles (Whittier to be more exact).  You would think that after nearly three years of various long distance patches (and hundreds of hours on skype) that the process of separation would be easier by now, but it doesn't really work like that.  Don't get me wrong, we handle it more maturely now than we did even a year ago, but the initial separation is still comparable to being punched in the stomach.  Well, I've never actually been punched in the stomach, so I guess I can't say, but you get the idea.  The worst part is that you know it's coming and there is nothing you can do to stop it.  Let me not digress too far in the "long distance" direction.

The good news of course is that we are on the home stretch of the long distance race, and the closer it gets to April the more excited I am to be getting married.  I know, I usually don't share things like that.  However, seeing as we're basically eloping, against the wishes of family and friends, I thought sharing some more personal details through social media would make up for it.  In case you didn't catch the sarcasm, I do realize that is a ridiculous proposal.  I'm very grateful for my understanding family and friends and their willingness to be respectful and supportive of our decision.

On that note, what I really want to share with all of you today is the story of our wedding rings.  I didn't want an engagement ring, which basically meant that I had to explain that again and again as people glanced at my left ring finger after hearing the good news.  I'll admit that it was mildly entertaining to see people's reactions.  Thomas and I knew that we wanted similar or somehow related wedding rings that were preferably hand crafted.  I suppose sometime last Spring we unconsciously put that particular intention out, but we never did any actual shopping around.

Fast forward to my time in India, where I'm feeling all "in line with the universe," where a vedic astrologer suggested that I wear a blue sapphire, where handcrafted fine jewelry is considerably cheaper than the west.  With these considerations, the idea of buying our wedding rings in India planted itself in my mind.  

I started looking around for local jewelers and ended up meeting a very interesting Indian jeweler named Om.  I made the effort to meet with him various times to talk about the price, design, etc., always over a cup of chai.  I started looking at the blue sapphires he had to offer, thanks to the astrologer bringing it to my attention but not really for the healing properties that he recommended.  As a side note, for that you have to buy a certain size based on your weight, the stone has to be touching your skin and you have to wear the stone on your arm for a few days to make sure it brings you good fortune, then it's made into a ring and on a certain day of the week you can start wearing it.  Anyway, to my surprise, I found one that I really liked even though I initially didn't imagine my wedding ring having any stone.

Thomas and I talked about it and decided to go for it.  I was hesitant at first, but I ultimately saw it as an opportunity to put what I was learning into practice by maintaining a sense of detachment from the outcome. So off to the ATM I went, which was somewhat risky considering I gave Om half the total, but I had met with him enough to trust him.  When he went MIA a few days later, I had a blink of a panic, but his friend next door kindly explained that Om had gone to his home village for a festival and would be returning the next day.  He did of course, we chatted briefly and he told me that the rings would be ready on Saturday.  That wasn't ideal, since I was leaving Rishikesh on Sunday, but he assured me that the rings were being made "shanti shanti" by the best local craftsmen.

As it turns out, they were made "shanti shanti" but Om and the craftsmen had a misunderstanding regarding the size.  Initially, when I went to pick them up on Saturday they were both my size.  Another blink of panic, more like a moment this time, and then Om assured me that it would be easily fixed by the time I left Sunday afternoon.  

Same size rings, Om in the background

I returned Sunday afternoon and only hours before leaving Rishikesh, I had both rings in the right size in my possession.  They are unique rings, and it doesn't bother me at all that the band is a little thicker than I wanted or whatever other small details didn't match my expectations.  Sometimes our expectations don't serve us well, and as long as we understand that we are free to not be "disappointed" by outcomes.  After all, it's just a ring.  I think we could all agree that although it's a nice outward symbol of love and commitment, it's only what's going on inside that really gives it meaning.  Try as we might to express love externally through material items, words and actions, can we ever really capture it's essence?  Maybe the best way to express love is not expression at all, but simply experiencing it.

Yoga Reading List

I tried to keep track of any book recommendations throughout my teacher training at Rishikesh Yog Peeth.  My weekly trip to the bookstore also helped to expand this list.  Although I firmly believe that yoga is an oral tradition passed on from teacher to student, human to human, these books are great tools for sparking curiosity and increasing understanding.  So, for those of you who read this blog for the latest update on my adventures, this post is not for you.  Eventually, I hope to re-post this entry on a yoga related blog/website.  Enjoy and please share!

Books that I own (thus may be borrowed)

1. Asana Pranayama Mudra Bandha by Swami Satyananda Saraswati (Bihar School of Yoga):  This was the main book used during my training.  For those of you who will be studying at RYP, it is provided for you at no extra cost.  It includes illustrated poses, Sanskrit and English names, breath and chakra awareness for each pose, breathing exercises (pranayama), introduction to chakras, mudras and bandhas.  I would not recommend this book for beginners.
2. Yogic Management of Common Diseases by Dr. Swami Karmananda (Bihar School of Yoga):  Great for someone interested in yoga and wellness or yoga therapy.
3. Swara Yoga: The Tantric Science of Brain Breathing by Swami Muktibodhananda (Bihar School of Yoga):  This book introduces the basics of Swara Yoga, which is about breath patterns, how those are related to the Lunar cycle and how to observe the patterns and use them to benefit your daily and spiritual life.  I'm currently reading this one and it's fascinating!
4. Yoga Nidra by Swami Satyananda Saraswati (Bihar School of Yoga):  This offers a comprehensive introduction to yoga nidra, yogic sleep or deep relaxation.  It offers great techniques for stress management and even has examples that you could use to guide a yoga nidra session.
5. Yoga Chudamani Upanishad: Crown Jewel of Yoga by Swami Satyadharma (Bihar School of Yoga):  A philosophical guide for higher spiritual development through kundalini awakening.  In other words, not for the faint of heart.
6. Chakras: Wheels of Life by Anodea Judith:  A great book for those interested in learning more about chakras!  It's easy to understand and well-organized.

Books that I hope to own

1. Living Gita published by Integral Yoga Publications
2. Yoga and Ayurveda by David Frawley
3. The Holy Science by Swami Sri Yukteswar
4. Four Chapters on Freedom published by Bihar School of Yoga
5. The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali by Sri Swami Satchidananda
6. Yoga Mat Companion 1, 2, 3, and 4 by Ray Long and published by Bandha Yoga (four separate anatomy books)
7. Your Body Believes Every Word You Say: The Language of the Bodymind Connection by Barbara Hoberman Levine
8. El Corazón del Yoga by T.K.V. Desikachar (great for bilingual yoga students and teachers)
9. Light on Yoga by B.K.S Iyengar
10. Yoga: A Gem for Women by Geeta S. Iyengar

Obviously this is a limited list and there are many other great yoga books out there.  If you happen upon one of those, please send the title my way!




~om shanti~

Reminiscing: Rishikesh

A week ago today I left a place that had become a home to me, of course I'm mostly referring to Rishikesh Yog Peeth and all the wonderful people there, but I'm also referring to Rishikesh in general.  Now that I sit halfway around the world, I realize how much of an impact the place itself had on my experience in India.  It often works that way.  For me, places seem to take on personalities that leave me missing them as if they were people. 

As for the 'personality' of Rishikesh, it seemed to be a bit on the schizophrenic side at first glance, but I think that was my general first impression of India.  I got past that.  After I initially crossed the bridge over the Ganges river and looked past the roaming cows, I was taken by the beauty of the river set against the foothills of the Himalayas.  During the following weeks, I grew to appreciate more than just the nature that surrounded the city.  I felt safe and welcome there.  I even got a few small insights into the power of the years and years of meditation that have occurred along the Ganges.

Slowly, Rishikesh took on the personality of a mystic.  I could see past the trash, as in literally there was a huge mound of trash close to where I was staying.  I no longer feared being attacked by the many professional food snatchers, also known as monkeys.  I accepted the incessant honking horns and tuned more into the early morning chanting and the occasional om from a conch shell.  I begin to experience what was beyond the physical aspects of the city.  It only helped that I was there to experience a variety of festivals and see the large amount of Indian tourists that were drawn to this particular Holy city to celebrate.  
 

It took six weeks for Rishikesh to show itself to me in this way.  If I had only spent a few days there, my opinion may have remained with the schizophrenic title.  It takes time to really know a place, just like it takes time and patience to know a person.  When we are willing to take this time, we can grow to appreciate it, whatever it may be, and we can see beyond any imperfections that may be on the surface.  Challenging yourself to go beyond what you initially see is one of the many things I enjoy about traveling.


In fact, I was reminded of this challenge a few days after leaving Rishikesh when I was in Agra being hassled by everyone, including some guy who wanted to do my laundry.  Really, some laundry shop owner was yelling at me as I walked down the street..."10 rupee small item, 15 rupee large item, pick up in the afternoon."  I left Agra the next day, so it's hard for me to say much at all about that place, but Rishikesh remains with me.  All the places I've taken the time for do.   

Life in Every Photo Continued

Here are a few more of my self-portraits from India...

d.d.

out into india

sun.day.

ganga view

one of the last classes!

after 108 sun salutations

ceremon.ious.

rest at taj mahal

last day in Delhi

Teachers teaching teachers

As we wrap everything up this week, it's all about us as students teaching the asana classes.  It's been such a great experience to see how we have all developed in our practice throughout the course.  I taught last night and it came really naturally to me and just confirmed how much I'm looking forward to sharing my knowledge of asana and yoga in general. 

As we teach this week, I'm realizing how much we have learned from each other over the six weeks.  It's not just about getting up and going through an hour asana class to show what you know.  Of course, this is an important part of yoga, but what's more important is how you live yoga off the mat in your day to day life.  From this point of view, we can see every person we encounter as an opportunity to learn something about the nature of our own self, and therefore human nature, which is so intimately tied to the aim of yoga. 

With this in mind, I've come to see so many of the wonderful people in my life as "yoga" teachers preparing me for my experience here.  They may not be practicing asana or using any yoga terms, but they are practicing bhakti yoga in their devotion to whatever it might be, or they are able to attain a level of one-pointedness when it comes to the present moment.  Or maybe they are living a simple life with a sense of detachment and an understanding that we cannot get infinite happiness from finite matter.  Whatever lessons I have learned from those around me in the past, have come back to my conscious mind during my time here and I'm truly grateful for that.

Essentially the whole time here at Rishikesh Yog Peeth we have just been teachers teaching teachers, who are also teaching themselves along the way.  It's not complicated, although it may seem to be at first.  When we have the final ceremony in a few days, for me it will be more about making a commitment to my own personal practice and a commitment to stay with the teacher within.  If I'm able to help some others on their personal path in yoga, then I will take on that task with the same level of attention and intention that I give my own practice.

I will thoroughly enjoy my last few days in Rishikesh.  I'm realizing more and more how much information I've been given over the past six weeks and how much time is needed for contemplation.  My experience speaks to me, but I feel that I cannot speak for my experience, at least not yet.  Maybe more words will come to describe the time I've spent here, but maybe not.  Sometimes experiencing something is the only way to convey a sense of understanding, and for that reason I'm so thankful for my experience here.  

Attached to Asana

Nature is always telling us something, but rarely are we listening.  I think I'm in tune with what my body is telling me, but I'm also aware of my Western upbringing when it comes to "pushing yourself."  Last week, I was moving right along through all the asana classes and felt great.  By Saturday evening, the ease in my body was slowly being replaced by a sore butt.  Sunday morning I was still feeling up to my normal personal practice routine, but in retrospect I took it a little too far and it only takes one or two centimeters of "pushing" before nature really kicks it up a notch to make sure you get the message.  I got the message loud and clear after a few too many, too intense forward bends.

This of course started a cascade of thoughts in my mind from anger (directed at myself) to a sense of loss, to almost panic.  Thanks to being exposed over and over again to the notion of awareness and how thoughts influence emotions, I was able to just sit with the thoughts and wait for them to pass.  Don't get me wrong, I'm no yogi yet, this still took me more time then I would like to reflect on at this point.  It's said that a yogi only needs one breath to calm the mind.  After the initial thought/emotion circle passed, then I was able to see the situation for what it really was.

Obviously, it was there to teach me something, at least one thing if not more.  Clearly, my body told me something at some point, but I turned my awareness away from that, even if it was only for a few moments.  More importantly it left me wondering: am I that attached to asana and the external benefits it has on my body that I panic at the thought of not being able to touch my head to my knees for a few days??  That is when I realized how ridiculously un-yogi I was being.

After all, the aim of yoga is not to touch your head to knees or hold a headstand for 20 minutes, but rather to work with your body as a tool to work deeper with your mind and even beyond that.  I won't get too philosophical on you today, no worries.  I'm just trying to convey the sense of attachment that we all struggle with in some way, whether it's material things, people, or even our own body.  All of these things are merely existing for some time.  Sorry, that is getting even deeper in the philosophical black hole.

Now that my body made sure that I'm aware of the changes going on, I am more aware of it during asana practice.  Nature always knows how to get your attention and change your intention.  Today I found myself enjoying my practice even more because I had to really give my body some more good intentions as I entered different poses.  It's like I had to gain my body's trust again, so you can imagine how funny my internal dialogue was as I attempted a forward bend. 

If we can't yet manage to be aware of nature as a whole, maybe we should all just start with our own body.  It's always telling you something.  Learn to listen.         

Meeting me halfway

My first yoga experience came in the form of a VHS tape that my parents bought for me when I was around 14.  I was having trouble sleeping at the time, so relaxing before bed with this 30 minute asana practice seemed to help.  Little did I know at the time that yoga would continue to find it's way into my life in many forms always leaving a desire for more, mostly more understanding. 

Now, more than ten years later here I am in Rishikesh, India, trying to dive deeper into the experience of yoga.  Although I am halfway through my teacher training course, I feel as if I am only seeing my own reflection in the vast ocean that we call yoga.  It may sound strange, in fact many things I'm about say will probably sound strange, but yoga is an infinite concept; it always has been and always will be.  For this reason, yoga can be described and experienced in an infinite number of ways.  Lucky for you, I don't have an infinite amount of time or understanding and I believe that the best way to understand yoga is through experience.  After all, that is what brought me here in the first place.  I experienced that there was more to yoga than a one hour asana (posture) class.

As a side note, I realized recently that my emails to family and friends usually go something like: "everything is great, there is too much to say, I'm learning a lot, etc etc."  I try not to include too many philosophical ideas, but they sneak in from time to time.  I'm sure these emails have left some confusion, or maybe people just think I've really lost touch with reality at this point.  I definitely have lost touch with what was my reality.  I would like to write something that others could contemplate on, but truthfully I'm writing this for me.  With all the information that is coming in, it's somehow necessary to do some thinking "out loud."    

Since the beginning of this year I came to rely on yoga for many reasons.  It became a great way to let go of stress, increase my concentration, and become more aware of my body.  Of course, the physical benefits are great too, but a healthy body cannot exist without a healthy mind and this was a struggle for me over the first half of this year.  Although every day here my understanding of yoga is being challenged and evolving at the same time, what I'm finding to be key factors in the understanding of yoga is balance and awareness.

There are so many things that we discuss here that come back to balance and/or awareness.  We practice asana to bring awareness to the gross aspect of the body so we can eventually expand that awareness to gain control of the mind.  Through regulating our thoughts in the mind, we can further regulate the body and preserve the flow of prana (energy) in that body.  Furthermore, we influence the flow of prana through pranayama (breathing exercises).  In these practices we bring our awareness to the breath to help calm the thoughts and to balance the activity between the right and left brain which is necessary for meditation and advancement in yoga.  There are also cleansing techniques used specifically for bringing about this left and right brain balance, which is manifested in the body when both nostrils are open. It continues like this in a network pattern of everything effecting every other thing on the subtle mind and consciousness level and the gross body level. 

In case you didn't get the message through the last confusing paragraph, yoga is more than a 90 minute, three times per week, get a hot body workout.  The physical body will look better for sure, but that is not the aim of yoga.  It's a journey of you meeting you time and time again, on and off your mat.  It's about finding balance between the two opposing forces that exist in everyone.  It's about expanding awareness of mind, body and soul (or consciousness, or whatever you decide to call "it"), where the ultimate goal is free will.  You may say that you already have free will, but think about that next time you have road rage that seems out of your control and get back to me.  

For me (and for now), free will means that I am influencing any given situation and all of my actions are voluntary, as opposed to involuntary reactions.  I don't know a single person who has achieved this, but it's told here that those who do achieve this go to the Himalayas for renunciation.  I think it's not because they don't want to help others, but because they have the understanding that each person is responsible for his or her own path in yoga or any other tradition.

As one of my teachers here says, "if you are confused, need not be."  Just start experiencing an asana class from time to time and see what happens.  I'd be happy to help when I'm back in November :-) 

Until next time remember that yoga is always happening.   

Life in every photo

When I arrived in Rishikesh, I decided to commit to taking an interesting photo of myself every day while I'm here.  Of course, this is partly just to capture my experience and be able to show others a bit of my life here.  Plus, I usually don't take a lot of photos of myself, so it is somewhat challenging.  Beyond that, photographs seem to have the ability to take us back to a particular moment.  They evoke emotions, smells, sounds and an awareness of what was going through the mind when it was taken.  So, maybe that is why I decided to do this.  Or maybe it's to sharply contrast that although I'm changing internally, it may not be easy to notice externally.

Here are some of my favorites so far..  

in the beginning...

chakra coloring

heat up

a lot of things happen in this space

Ganga

adven.temple.

Hunger of the mind

My first week here at Rishikesh Yog Peeth is coming to an end.  It feels like I've been here for longer than a week and only a few minutes at the same time.  The days go by so quickly, yet so much is happening externally and internally during that time that I sometimes lose track of when a particular event occurred.  At one point last week I spent a good five minutes trying to determine whether I took a certain photo that morning or the day before (it seemed important at the time).  Of course, getting up at 5:30 am every day makes a huge difference on how one perceives time and the length of a day. 

Just to give you a little more insight on what's going on here, we start the day with herbal tea and some cleansing practices (neti pot and kapalbhati pranayama).  Then we have about 90 minutes of asana practice, which we start with some chanting to help calm the mind and bring awareness to the breath.  After asana, it's breakfast and lectures on philosophy and anatomy before lunch.  Our evening asana class start at 5:30 pm and lasts roughly 90 minutes.

Since Rishikesh Yog Peeth is in the process of building an ashram, we are staying in a guesthouse that they have turned into a yoga center.  It's definitely more luxurious than I expected to find, but it's still India.  The important thing is that I started feeling really at home here in a short time.  The energy here is so inviting and open that it would be hard to not feel at ease. 

So, that covers the basics, but what am I really doing here?  Well, if you know me even a little bit, than you know that I have a never ending desire to learn and since starting to practice yoga asana in the states, I have had many questions about the why behind the postures and practices I've learned.  I also was just curious about India and how yoga here is different or similar to yoga in the west.  Those are important reasons, but honestly I decided to come here based on a feeling, an inclination, my intuition, or whatever else you chose to name it.  I am so grateful that I did.

I am learning a lot about yoga and so far what I find the most fascinating is the philosophy.  It has given me a lot to think about and brought up a lot of ideas that I have heard before but struggled with understanding.  We have had the opportunity to have intriguing discussions surrounding the definition of yoga, the goal of yoga, the nature of consciousness and so much more.  I will share more but right now I need to handle these things in my own way and time.

As for the anatomy, I just have to say one thing and that is that I am so thankful for Roshan teaching about the body as it's own greatest healer.  Many people here don't have the same health science and anatomy background that I have, so it's refreshing to know that more and more people are educating themselves on how to care for the body according to nature.  I have my father and my own experiences to thank as well.

Until next time...no harm to anybody and benefit to at least somebody. 

Let it burn

Last night I had the amazing opportunity to go to a traditional Hindu festival that occurs every year around this time.  It is called Dashahara, among many other names, but if you google Dashahara you should easily be able to find more information.  The basic idea is that it is celebrating the victory of good over evil.  One of our teachers here at Rishikesh Yog Peeth described it as burning negativity, as fire plays a crucial role in Hinduism.

Like many religious traditions, this is also based on an allegory.  From my little understanding of this story, I can say that it is about Ram defeating the demon Ravana in order to save his wive, Sita, who was captured by Ravana.  Ram is able to achieve this with the help of his brother Lakshmana and their follower Hanuman and his army of monkeys.  Got it?  Well, it's not that easy, but you get the idea.

So, we walked to another area in Rishikesh along the river where they had constructed a huge representation of Ravana.  When we first arrived, they were beginning to play out the story around Ravana, which included kids running around him in circles, Hanuman coming with his army of men dressed as monkeys, and a loud speaker of Ravana taunting them all.

There was quite a crowd, westerners and Indians alike.  Shortly after sunset, a lot of fireworks were set off over the river and some accidentally in the river and some just on the ground, hopefully nobody was hurt by this.  Although fire is really important, fire safety seems to take the backseat.  Then it finally came to setting fire to Ravana.

I was all prepared to get a nice photo of this happening as the men approached Ravana with torches and doused his legs with lighter fluid.  Next thing I know, we (as in the westerners who don't know what to expect from this spectacle) are going for the good old duck and cover move.  The entire statue was loaded with firecrackers, big ones, as in I could feel the explosion of the whole thing.  Within seconds there were only a few faces and the wire structure left to tear down.  They take this burning negativity a little more serious than I thought.  Shouldn't we all?

At a glance

Here is a first look into my journey in India....

Train to Haridwar

Paharganj in Delhi

Looking Closely

Ganga

On the roof and into the yoga shala

Rishikesh

I have so many more, but the dodgy internet connection makes this a time consuming process. I`ll add more as I can. Enjoy!

Arriving

I usually wait for some sort of complete thought before hitting the keyboard, but there is really so much to say and I would like to say something about India so far, rather than nothing at all.  I tried to come with as few expectations as possible, which I think helped me a lot when I arrived in Delhi.

It was surprisingly easy to get from the airport to the New Delhi train station for about 80 rupees (less than 2 USD).  My suspense of the pending culture shock grew for the 23 minutes I sat on that train.  As I walked up to the train station, I would have to say the first thing that hit me was the smell...the smell of food, people, trash, and most of all pollution.  Of course it was crowded and I had to deal with being hassled from time to time, after all I was the only white person that I saw there.  Overall, I didn't feel that shocked; I think I was just ready to put my things down and get some rest.


It wasn't too hard to find a place to stay in the main bazaar area of Delhi, but walking around even without my big backpack was exhausting.  There is so much going on there between auto and bike rickshaws (like a mini taxi, sort of), shops, street food, dust, fumes and lots of people, it is nearly impossible to focus on one thing or have one single clear thought among the craziness.  I did, however, voluntarily stay in that busy area, so I somehow enjoyed this experience.  

I only spent one night in Delhi before heading towards Rishikesh for the yoga course.  Taking a train from Old Delhi at 5 am was an abrupt way to start the day.  I had to first dodge getting hit by rickshaws as I crossed the street where my taxi dropped me off, then I was at this point a bit thrown off to see easily more than a hundred people sleeping outside and inside the train station.  I found my platform with ease and intuitively sought out a nice person to sit next to while waiting for my train.  That worked perfectly and I had a very easy conversation with a guy who works for a MetLife call center in Delhi.  The good vibes kept coming my way the rest of the day, making my journey to Rishikesh long but well worth it.  This was really my first day in India and I met a few really interesting people who were helpful, welcoming and weren't too pushy about maintaining a long conversation (which I had been warned about from a few friends who have been to India).

I'm still getting a feel for Rishikesh, but it's definitely calmer than Delhi, which is expected since it's smaller and is considered a Holy city (that doesn't stop anyone from the incessant horn honking that drives my ears crazy).  What I can say about it is that it's along the Ganges river with jungle covered hills almost like a backdrop. It's full of color, monkeys and cows.  More on that later.

So that about covers a tenth of what I've experienced so far.  The course started officially yesterday and I am already learning so much and have a lot to digest in the mean time.  I hope to post some photos sometime this week and maybe some more things about the course as well.

I hope all is well!